Archive for December, 2007

Holiday Gay

The following are excerpts from the novel, HOLIDAY GAY, originallly published in 1967 and reissued in 2008 as part of the anthology The Man From C.A.M.P. (MLR Press)

There was something about the holiday season and Christmas time that Jackie Holmes always especially liked.  Most of all, it was evenings like this one, set aside for trimming the tree.  Here he was, in a cozy warm apartment.  The fire was blazing brightly in the fireplace.  A tall fir tree had been correctly placed in its stand and was already saturating the room with its delicious scent.  Hot toddies had gone a long way to putting him in a dreamy mood.  And to make the picture complete, he had the benefit of delightful company.  There beside him was one of those beautiful young men one usually just dreams about – tall, husky, with gray eyes behind long lashes, olive hued skin, and erotically carved mouth.  The picture couldn’t have been more perfect.            “How do you like those balls?”            “Perfect,”  Jackie murmured appreciatively.  He traced a finger over one of them.            “What about this, do you think it’s too big?”            “Not at all.  It looks better standing, though, than it did hanging.  I wish we could put it on top of the tree.”            His companion laughed, a deep, throaty sound that sent a shiver up Jackie’s spine.  “Too Much weight, I’m afraid.  It would bend the tree down.”            “I guess you’re right.  But the color’s perfect – that deep red crown.”  Jackie paused for a moment, devoting himself to his efforts.            “That’s better,”  his friend surveyed the results of the efforts.  “That gives it a shiny look, makes it glisten.  I think that’s more appropriate.”            Jackie frowned thoughtfully.  “Maybe just a little more,”  he suggested.  After a moment, he added,  “Christmas just isn’t Christmas without sweets.  Hard candy at that.”            “I don’t know when I’ve enjoyed the season more.  I almost wish it were Christmas Eve.  That part about going off up the chimney always gets to me.”            “Sounds like a waste to me,”  Jackie answered.  He turned slightly on the bearskin rug, and his glance fell momentarily on the tall Christmas tree.  Beside it, still unopened, was the large trunk in which he always stored the decorations.  Oh well, he thought philosophically, he could always trim it tomorrow.  As it turned out, he had far more urgent things to tend to this evening.            He looked back at his companion.  Like Jackie, Lorenzo was naked, reclining lazily on the soft rug.  He smiled, his dark lips parting to reveal dazzling, even teeth.  In the firelight, his satiny skin gleamed maddeningly.  Jackie reached out to the broad chest, and ran one finger lightly over a brown nipple.  His finger slipped downward, over the rippling surface of a brown stomach.  It curled in the thick patch of gleaming black hair, and then it was back to its previous source of pleasure.            A massive arm moved about him, pulling him close again, and Jackie felt himself drawn into the gray depths of those haunting eyes.  His lips were crushed beneath another pair, and then a warm tongue invaded his mouth.  Jackie shivered as a strong male hand stroked his back, making its way downward.            ”Beautiful box,”  Lorenzo managed to whisper.  “I wouldn’t mind getting something of that.”            “I hope you don’t want to wait till Christmas.”  Jackie tensed momentarily, and then relaxed to the firm, confident exploration that was taking place.  Sexually, he regarded himself as a seasoned traveler; and the seasoned traveler, he had learned from experience, had to be prepared to travel whatever route necessary to reach his destination.  At times, that had meant traveling virgin territory, but not in this instance.            He was rolled gently over, onto his back.  For a moment they lay like that, the powerful weight of Lorenzo’s body crushing him down against the rug.  It lifted then, and he felt his legs being raised into the air, balanced on wide, thickly muscled shoulders.  He opened his eyes to smile up into Lorenzo’s eager, thrilled face.            “Should I say please?”  His companion wanted to know.            “Save your breath for ‘thank you’,”  Jackie informed him.  They kissed, and he felt the first, tentative probings, then a slowly increasing pressure.  He was reminded for a brief second, of his companion’s impressive size, but the memory was not an unpleasant one.  He moaned softly, more from pleasure than from pain, and then he felt himself filling up, seeming to swell with pleasure as the sensations moved rigidly deeper.            Lorenzo kissed him, and then buried his face in Jackie’s hair, gasping hoarsely.  “Dio, it’s never been like this.  I’m in Heaven.”            “I’ll be there myself by the time this is finished,”  Jackie informed him.  “Because I think I’m going to have the hell screwed out of me.”            He was right in his expectations.  Until now, it had been forceful, but cautious.  It moved on until its journey was completed, the lovely ornaments that Jackie had admired before brushing gently against against the smoothness of his taut buttocks.  Then, scattering goosebumps over his flesh, Jackie felt it withdrawing, slowly, slowly-only to come crushing into him again, this time with an intense ferocity.            Jackie moaned again, arching upward off the rug.  “Careful of the rib cage,”  he managed to gasp, as the plunging became a roller coaster ride at breakneck speed.            “Ah, ah,”  Lorenzo sighed and sobbed, hurling himself against his partner.  “So beautiful, so unbelievable, It’s like a miracle.”            Then so abruptly that it was shocking, he came to a complete stop.  “It is a miracle,”  he exclaimed, his eyes wide with astonishment.  “Listen, I hear bells!”            For the first time, Jackie heard them too, filtering through he haze of his arousal – chimes, actually, a special signal that only he would understand.            “Christ!”  he swore aloud.            This exclamation only increased his partner’s consternation.  “Then it is truly a miracle, a virgin birth – the second coming!”            “Hardly virgin,”  Jackie reminded him.  “Although any birth from this would certainly be a miracle.  Anyway, I think we can forget about coming.”He extricated himself from the now passive embrace of his befuddled partner.  “Don’t go away,”  he said, heading with reluctance toward his bedroom. Annoying though it might be, he could not ignore the summons of the chimes.  His training on that score had been thorough, and he was dedicated to his duty.            In the bedroom, he went directly to the long low dresser.  On its surface was a figurine of a naked youth, seated.  Its appearance suggested nothing more than a piece of decorative art, but in reality it was more than that.  Jackie lifted it from the surface of the dresser, knowing that a concealed switch would start it operating at once.  He turned the bottom side up and lifted it to his face.  On this surface, too, it appeared perfectly innocent, but concealed cleverly within the posterior anatomy of the figurine was a miniature speaker, into which he now spoke, in low, terse terms.            “Holmes here,”  he addressed the porcelain buttocks.  They were, he decided a poor substitute for the lovely pair he had so recently been fondling.  “Jackie?”  He recognized the familiar bass voice at once.            “Yes, Rich.  What’s up?”            “Maybe I should ask you that,”  the voice chuckled from the area of the porcelain crotch.  “Your voice has that come hither sound.”            “Hither, thither – how can I get around to coming anywhere when these damned chimes are always going off before I do.”            “Sorry about that,”  Rich said, then grew sober.  “But this is really hot.  Upton’s called, he wants to see you pronto.  Use Contact Hustler.”            Jackie’s annoyance paled – Contact Hustler meant something big.  ”I’m on my way,”  he answered.  Without waiting for further comment, he replaced the figure on the dresser, and started at once back to the living room.            Lorenzo was still bare on the bearskin rug, looking confused by the entire situation.  “Sorry,”  Jackie said as he entered the room.  “But that was business, big business.  I”ll have to go out.”                         “What about this big business?”  Lorenzo asked, indicating.  For all the distraction, his business was still up and throbbing painfully.

            Jackie went past him to the table where he had left his gift wrapping paraphernalia.  He selected a large ribbon with a bow and, coming back to his companion, slipped it neatly around the prominent portion of Lorenzo’s anatomy.  “Put it under the tree,”  he suggested.  “I’ll be back to open it later, okay?”


Having learned that jewel thieves are using department store Santas to rob the stores of jewelry Jackie subsequently goes in drag as child actress Shelly Tipple to try to crack the case – with unexpected results…. 


  At first, Rich did not recognize the creature who entered the apartment the next day.  It was exactly as though the child actress had stepped from the movie screen of several years ago.  Her blonde hair hung in curls over her shoulders.  She wore a jaunty sailor cap, and a frilly skirt, and there were large bows on her patent leather shoes.  In one hand, she carried a small purse, and in the other, a huge lollipop.            While Rich stared in amazement, the little moppet did a brief soft shoe and sang, in a high, lisping voice, a few bars of the hit tune from her baseball movie:  “Show me your balls and I’ll take a crack at them.”            “It’s unbelievable,”  Rich declared.  “You look like a sweet little girl.  You look, in fact, exactly like Shelley Tipple, a few years ago.”            “You say the nicest things,”  Jackie answered in his normal voice.  “But I’m glad you like it.  After all, I want my daddy to be happy with me.”            “Your daddy?”            “Of course, I’ve always said I wanted you for a daddy.  And a little girl like me can’t just go running around town by herself.  Suppose I got molested?”            “Perish the thought,”  Rich said with a laugh.  “Well, I suppose you’re right.  I’ll have to clear it with High Camp, and arrange to have the office monitored.  But, frankly, I don’t think I’d want to miss this performance for anything.”              A short time later, they were making their way through the crowds at Marcy’s Westside department store.  Jackie held tightly to Rich’s hand, tickling the palm occasionally, to Rich’s discomfort.            The Santa Claus department was on the fourth floor.  Already, though it was early, there was a long line of children waiting with their mothers and a few fathers.            “Oh, Daddy,”  Jackie squealed, jumping up and down on one foot,  “There he is.  It’s Santa Claus.”            Rich smothered his embarrassment and took his place in line with his “daughter.”  The line moved forward slowly.  The children fidgeted.  Some of them cried, or yelled.  The little boy in front of them stared at Jackie for a while and then stuck out his tongue.  Jackie stuck out his as well.            “Now be nice, dear,”  Rich warned him, tugging his hand as the mother turned around to glower at them.            “Oh, sure,”  Jackie agreed reluctantly.  He shoved his lollipop in the little boy’s face.  “Here, wanna suck?”            The mother nervously yanked her son in front of her.  ”Charming little girl,”  she said without enthusiasm.  “But isn’t she a bit big for this sort of thing?”            “Jackie Sue?”  Rich asked.  “Oh, she’s just tall for her age.  She’s only eight.”            “Heavens, what on earth do you give her to eat?”            “Oh, she eats a variety of things,”  Rich said. “She can’t seem to get enough of the things she likes.”            “Mostly meat,”  Jackie Sue added.  “I love tons of meat, fresh, hot meat, especially big fat sausages.  And loads of cream.”            “And cheese,”  Rich suggested.            “Ugh.”  Jackie Sue made a face.            “Sounds like a heavy diet for a young girl,”  the woman said doubtfully.            “It puts hair on my chest,”  Jackie Sue answered, to the woman’s dismay.            “She’s got quite a sense of humor,”  Rich said, giving Jackie’s hand an anxious tug.            “So I see.  Well, as big as she is, I’ll bet the boys don’t tease her much.”            “Oh, I hate a boy who’s a tease,”  Jackie Sue said.  “I like boys who are soft on me.  But if a boy gets hard, why, then, I sit on him.  I’ve sat on lots of boys.  They always come after a while.  To their senses, I mean.”            The line moved forward again.  The woman seemed to have given up the conversation.  After another long wait it was time for her son to chat with Santa, and Rich and Jackie were next in line.  Jackie took advantage of the opportunity to study the Santa.  He looked like an ordinary department store Santa Claus, and not at all like a jewel thief.  But then, Jackie reminded himself, just at the moment he didn’t look like a secret agent, either.  You just couldn’t go by appearances in this business.            At last it was Jackie’s turn.  Ignoring the surprise on Santa’s face, he skipped up the length of the carpet and proceeded to climb up on one big knee.            “My,”  Santa said, obviously finding this visitor heavier than most.  “You’re a big girl, aren’t you?”            “The better to climb your tree,”  Jackie quipped in his little girl voice.  He had decided to make his play right away.  Without waiting for further conversation, he broke into song – “Deck the Halls with Boughs of Holly . . . “  He paused at this point.            Santa gave him another surprised look.  Then, after a pause, he laughed and finished the line – “Fa la la la la, la la la la.”            There was an awkward pause.  Uncertain just what the procedure was with the gang, Jackie decided to continue.  “Tis the season to be jolly . . . .”  This time Santa didn’t laugh, but with a shrug added the fa la las.            “Don we now our gay apparel,”  sang Jackie.            “Are you planning on becoming a singer?”  Santa asked, tiring of the singing game.            “Have you heard enough?”  Jackie asked.            “Oh, quite,”  Santa assured him, getting a bit impatient.  “After all, you didn’t come here to serenade Santa, did you?”            “Oh, no, not at all.  I came to get some goodies.”            “I see.  Any special goodies?”  Santa had regained his usual air of good cheer.            “Very special ones,”  Jackie replied in a lower voice.  “Something with feathers.            “I see.”  Santa was momentarily at a loss.  “Well, I don’t think we have any canaries on hand, but maybe by Christmas Eve . . . “            “Why don’t you just slip it to me?”  Jackie whispered, giving the bewhiskered man a wink.            “I beg your pardon!”            “You know, what you’ve been saving up for me.  Give it to me, okay, pops.”            Santa’s face reddened.  He cleared his throat.  “My, you’re a precocious thing, aren’t you?  Could it be possible that you’ve heard rumors about me . . . ?”            “Not just rumors,”  Jackie assured him.  They were talking now in lowered voices, although Santa kept glancing nervously at the waiting line of parents and children.  “I know about your special things for little girls – the right little girls.  I’m here to get mine.  And I assure you, I’m the right little girl for you.”            “Well, yes, of course, I can see that,”  Santa said with a nervous giggle.  “But of course, you know I couldn’t do anything like that here, with all these people watching.”            “Then I’ll meet you somewhere.  How about in the stock room?”            “The stock room?  You want – you want to meet me?”            “Sure, and anyway you want to spell it, too.”  Jackie winked again.            “Oh, I see.”  Santa seemed increasingly nervous. “What did you say your name was – Lolita?”            “Jackie Sue.  Look, I haven’t got much time, I’m meeting another old guy later.  Can we make this a quickie?”            “What about your daddy?”            “Him?  Oh, don’t worry, he’s in on it.  He always goes along when I’m after this sort of thing, just to make it safer.  No questions asked that way, don’t you get it?”            “Yes.  I must say, it’s a unique arrangement.  Well, I take a break in fifteen minutes.  If you’re sure, why don’t you sort of hang around and follow me down to the stockroom.  “We’ll work something out, okay?”            “Now you’re talking.”  Jackie raised his voice again.  “Oh, Santa, you’re such a card.”  He gave Santa a smack on the cheek with his lollipop.  “I can’t wait to see what you’ve got for me.”            “Well, it’s nothing spectacular,”  Santa admitted ruefully.  “I mean, don’t expect too much.”            “It may be small,”  Jackie whispered.  “But I’ll bet it’s priceless.”            Santa blushed again.  “I’ve been told it’s very nice,”  he admitted.            The other children were getting impatient. Santa reached into the large box beside him and brought out a small present – not, Jackie noticed, a lavender one.  “Here’s a little something from Santa,”  he said loudly.  In a lower voice, he added,  “I’ll have something special for you down in the stockroom.”            “Goodbye, Santa,”  Jackie chirped, climbing down off the knee.  With a final wink, he skipped over to where Rich was waiting and grabbed Rich’s hand.  “Okay, Daddy, let’s go,”  he said, tugging his partner away.            “How did you do?”  Rich asked as soon as they had moved away from the crowd.            “Fine,”  Jackie assured him.  “although personally I think this guy’s goofy.  But I’m to follow him to the stockroom in a few minutes.  He’ll give me the real stuff there.  Apparently, they aren’t taking any chances.  They may be getting nervous.”  He related his conversation with Santa.            “I don’t know, it sounds strange to me,”  Rich said.  “Maybe they have gotten wise.”            “I don’t see how.  Anyway, this guy is just so much blubber.  I can handle him all right.            “Maybe so.  Still, while you’re waiting for him to take his break, I think I’ll check it out with High Camp, just to see if there’s any dew developments.  You never know.”            “Okay.  I’ll wait here where I can watch Santa.  But make it fast.”            Rich hurried away through the crowds, in search of a phone.  Jackie turned back, to discover that Santa was just closing up his shop – to take a break, the sign said, to feed his reindeer.  As the red-suited man crossed the store, he gave Jackie a wink and a quick nod of his head.  There was nothing Jackie could do but follow him and hope that Rich would not be gone long.            Santa disappeared through a door marked EMPLYEES ONLY.  Jackie paused, glanced around to confirm that he wasn’t noticed, and slipped through the door.  Ahead of him, Santa paused beside an aisle that led through the stock bins.  When he saw Jackie, he again jerked his head and disappeared down the aisle.  Jackie followed him.  As he came to the end of the bin, he found Santa waiting for him, safely away from any observors.            “Well, have you got it with you?”  Jackie in a low voice.            Santa looked startled.  “I could hardly leave it behind,”  he said.            “Where is it?”            “Where . . . ?  Why, in my pants, of course.”            “Oh.”  Jackie was increasingly uneasy.  This man seemed to be stalling for some reason.  Maybe this was a trap.  Or, maybe Santa still wasn’t convinced that he was a member of the gang.            “Well, let me have it,”  Jackie said.  “I hope that it’s lavender, with feathers.”            At this Santa truly was startled.  His eyes went wide.  “What the hell do you want with feathers?”            “Maybe I like to be tickled,”  Jackie answered, giving him a coy smile.            “Oh, I see,”  Santa said nodding.  A lecherous expression came over his face.  “Just playful, huh.  Well, come here, you little minx, Santa will tickle you plenty.”            He made a grab for Jackie, flinging his arms around the ruffled shoulders.  “Hey,”  Jackie gave a muffled squeal.  “Take it easy.  I have to see you package first.”            “Heavens, you are certainly forward for a little girl.  But, if you insist . . . “  Relinquishing his hold on Jackie, Santa began to unbuckle his wide belt.  “Did anyone ever tell you you look just like . . . ?”            It was at that moment that Rich appeared, rushing down the aisle.  “What’s the big idea?”  He demanded in an angry voice.            “Oh . . . !”  Santa stopped with his pants hanging open and his stiff rod jutting out – he had certainly been right, Jackie thought, when he had said not to expect too much.  He gave Jackie a look of consternation.  “I thought you said Daddy knew all about this.”            “But, Daddy,”  Jackie tried to say, puzzled by Rich’s show of temper.  “This nice man . . .”            “Never mind,”  Rich bellowed.  His loud voice had produced instant results.  Already other employees had stepped into the aisle to stare at the trio.  “How dare you, you monster – molesting my innocent little daughter.  I ought to thrash you.”            But – but . . .”  Santa sputtered, looking about in horror at the growing crowd of angry and shocked onlookers.            “Daddy, darling,”  Jackie tried again.            “Come on, dear.”  Rich grabbed his hand and fairly dragged jackie away.  “We’ll talk to the manager about this.” 

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